It's because I'm so ridiculously fabulous...

I’m feeling strangely upbeat today. I’ve been smiling all morning. Considering what my mood has been like over the past few days… I’m glad I’m back to being silly, and upbeat others.I could attribute this to any one of the following things:

1. I have a new Wallet

2. I washed my hair. Something about newly washed hair makes you feel clean all over, down to your soul.
I did something possibly very foolish last night, which might have just marked the beginnings of the genius idea for the book I’ve wanted to write.
I decided that every time I felt like I was going to think about the bad stuff, I was just going to stop everything and sing ‘Barbie Girl’ instead.
I realized that how unpredictable life is and how if someone had told me 6 months ago that all the shit that has happened…would happen… I would have pooped my pants. So really…there is no sense if me being all ‘woe is me’ about whatever because what the fuck do I really know?
They played ‘brass in pocket’ on the radio this morning on the drive to work.
Speaking of the drive to work… I took a different route. That’s huge. I’m such a creature of habit and routine… but something about this morning inspired me to drive a different way. Small changes.It finally makes sense to me. I’ve been suffering from ‘senioritis’… except, I’m not a senior. I haven’t wanted to do anything…I’ve been putting everything off from the simple things to the big things. God, I can’t remember the last time I went to the gym. With the grandparents coming this weekend to visit…I think I’ll be hitting the gym more. I have to at least make it look like I care…My hair is growing out. I’m really happy about this. Short hair was fun, and I needed that side of my personality to come out but something about longer hair calms me down. I need to be a bit more rational. And yes, hair can do that for me.So I’ve decided… again… that I’m going to go back to Grad School. The problem now is… I have no idea what I want to do. I like so many different things…I think the issue now is finding a program that I wont lose interest in. It will have to be very interdisciplinary. I’m interdisciplinary. I think I want to be an expert in something…I just don’t know what.I love writing. But do I really want to pursue an education in it?
I’m very interested in sex and gender studies, but I don’t want a feminist education. The idea of getting a Master’s in women’s studies bores me.I wish there was a program that blended cognitive science and neuro psychology with the philosophy of gender and sexuality. Maybe something that focused on helping intersexed children and promoting awareness. I love studying the why’s and how’s. The idea of counseling intrigues me. I could see myself as an educational counselor/advisor. I’ve done that sort of thing for undergrad students before…and I loved it. It’s the best way I utilize my empathetic side. I’m good at getting inside a person’s head and sorting stuff out.If my work could do something to change public policy and instigate social change and awareness…I think I’d die a happy woman. I suppose that would be my end goal.
To inspire change for the better… or just cause it. Oh.. and if that happened to result in superstardom for me.. well hey… I’ll take that too! Is there a Master’s program out there that can do that for me?I guess I still don’t know what I really want to be when I grow up. I just have to be creative. I have to be able to say what I think. I have to be able to want a lot of things and not have it hurt me.I’m tired of being told that it’s not possible. If it’s possible to fucking walk on the moon, it’s certainly possible for me to get everything I want. If it’s possible for assholes to walk among us and get everything they want because they don’t care about shit… then certainly the quality of the things people like me want would be much higher, and therefore much worthier of the time it takes to acquire them. I guess if I wanted shit… I could snap my fingers and get it like that. But I don’t want shit. I want magic. I want fireworks. I’m not an asshole. So I’m going to get it.

Hari-Hari Terakhir Di Sudan

With Rosli, Kat Dubai Airport.

With my friends, together with our big bos yg sgt baik hati dan byk beri tunjuk ajar. Just slightly before departure to Khartoum for final R&R.

Potong Daging

Haha..sapa sangka, pelajar yang paling takut dgn DARAH dalam Biology Class dah jadi pemotong daging yang handal kat Sudan ni..Aku pun tak percaya dgn apa yang aku buat ni, walau apa pun, aku dah ada kemajuan sikit dalam hal ni.. Gambar ni kitaorg ambik masa Raya Haji tempoh hari. Best giler...bergotong royong masak...sampai muka aku naik hitam kena asap..haha..

Inside Control Room

With Sudanis Process Engineer. Ibrahim nama mamat ni. Selalu buat aku pening kepala dgn idea and proposal yg logik but not practical to applied here. Nonetheless, he is one of the good engineer who always find a solution to solved any matters arrised.

The next pic was Kavi, my instrument technician. Very good and dedicated person. Always give a hand during inspection at field. Senang sekali bekerja dgn mamat dari Chennai India ni. Bila la agaknya aku dapat buat project kat sana..boleh jumpa dgn adik beradik Katrina Kaif..heheheee

Atas Flare

Gambar ni aku ambik masa buat Inspection Atas Flare. Dari sini aku dapat lihat hampir keseluruhan Plant ni. Memang besar giler Plant ni, naik letih lah jugak kalau jalan kaki tu..

Mamat sorang lagi ni Mario namanya. Kawan baik aku dari Philipine. Orgnya mmg baik dan aku senang sekali bekerja dgn dia. Muka "babyface" tapi umur 10 tahun lebih tua dari aku..Dia ajak aku berkunjung ke Metropolis, bercuti katanya. Aku pun tak sure lagi nak pergi ke tak..tgklah kalau free nanti.."Pagal Ko Sayong" haha...

Sambutan Maulidur Rasul

With my best friends , Wira, ada bakat jugak mamat ni.hehe...senasib dgn aku gak, masih bujang.

Wira di apit oleh Muthu dan Siva. Control Macho betul lah mamat yg posing kat tgh tu.

AJK memasak. Wan Rahman, Maarof dan Rosli. Posing beb, jgn tak posing

The Day When Minister Came

Last night I had another sleepless in Sudan. This scenario has been started since last week when I became the FOCAL person for Commssioning Team. Preparation for Minister visit today really make me headache, lot of things need to consider and recheck again and again, with the limitation of facilities, what can I do? . Arg...arg....this is really crazy. I have to faced the reality here, sometimes all the technical application can't be applied when political influence start to come in. It's very dificult to work with expatriate label in the "semi civilized" country like here.

With all these obstacles, I remember one thing, during my school days, my teacher always say "we do the best, let the GOD do the rest". Hopefully everything will run smoothly today.

To all my teachers, I loved you all. I'm one of your product.